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More about last week. There is apparently something in my bloodwork that indicates that I am likely heading towards a heart attack. My previous doctor put bandaids on things. When I hurt my back a few years ago, he gave me pain meds, didn’t send me for PT. I did that myself, and got over the back problems. I still go to the chiropractor regularly, and it really helps me.
This doctor wants to get in front of things. So I am waiting on a call for a chest scan, and a stress test … the chemical kind, since I can’t really move much at this moment. That sounds weird, they plug a line into your arm and suddenly your heart sounds like the ghost of Gene Krupa with an overhead cam and glass packs (thank you Tom Waits). It's gonna be weird.
This also means that some things we wanted to do we have to postpone. We’re hoping that it doesn’t interfere with Demicon. It’s one of only two shows this year.
Mentally I am still struggling. I still don’t want to pick up a guitar, even though we have a show in just a little over a month. It reminds me of the isolation which we still deal with in a lot of ways. We have no social life. I have very little joy in my life at the moment, and I am struggling to find some. Lizzie does what she can, but I am darn hard to deal with when I am like this.
I have tons of music written for the synth project, but still no words. I could have an entire album done, if I could just find the story I want to tell.
My job is tenuous. My boss has said that the reason I was kept on when the company did the quarantine layoffs was because he knew we had just bought our house 6 months before. I don’t really do anything, but I get paid fairly well. I need to make it 2ish more years, so I can claim the second tier of SS payments. I am not going to wait another 6 to get the full benefits. Fortunately Lizzie’s job is going extremely well.
It’s constant frustration now. I want to get moving, but I don't seem to be able to.
This doctor wants to get in front of things. So I am waiting on a call for a chest scan, and a stress test … the chemical kind, since I can’t really move much at this moment. That sounds weird, they plug a line into your arm and suddenly your heart sounds like the ghost of Gene Krupa with an overhead cam and glass packs (thank you Tom Waits). It's gonna be weird.
This also means that some things we wanted to do we have to postpone. We’re hoping that it doesn’t interfere with Demicon. It’s one of only two shows this year.
Mentally I am still struggling. I still don’t want to pick up a guitar, even though we have a show in just a little over a month. It reminds me of the isolation which we still deal with in a lot of ways. We have no social life. I have very little joy in my life at the moment, and I am struggling to find some. Lizzie does what she can, but I am darn hard to deal with when I am like this.
I have tons of music written for the synth project, but still no words. I could have an entire album done, if I could just find the story I want to tell.
My job is tenuous. My boss has said that the reason I was kept on when the company did the quarantine layoffs was because he knew we had just bought our house 6 months before. I don’t really do anything, but I get paid fairly well. I need to make it 2ish more years, so I can claim the second tier of SS payments. I am not going to wait another 6 to get the full benefits. Fortunately Lizzie’s job is going extremely well.
It’s constant frustration now. I want to get moving, but I don't seem to be able to.
